Awesome stuff

I must apologise for not being able to post anything recently, it's been really tough not working on a Friday. However, I just checked my awesome calendar... And realised it's time to update my list of 'things that are awesome'...
1. Fishing is awesome, boats are awesome, combine the two and catch the biggest mother flipping fish in history and you're off the awesome scale.

2. Taking your own bat to a baseball game.... awesome.

3. Jesus = awesome
4. John Turturro, is there anything you DON'T know?

5. Virtual reality + Murder She Wrote = AWESOME.

6. Aieee- shark shit.

7. This phone is not awesome, the guy holding the phone is. Love the waistcoat dude.

8. This dude's interpretive dance inspires me to be awesome.

9. This picture combines two things I never really thought were that good (Queen and Star Wars), but holy hell, put them together and they are AWESOME!

10. Zoolander you are awesome! You finally got your school up and running. Way to go!

Have an awesome weekend.

Charlie Shone

I can't believe it! I take a bit of time away from the computer and Charlie Sheen goes down in the most blog worthy manner leaving everyone asking the question: But I've been keeping my ear close to the ground and here's a snippet of what else went down while Charlie Sheen flipped his nut:

This ad went unanswered, leaving the greatest tribute act EVER on ice and Dallas still craving to have sugar poured on it (WTF?)

Some dick stole this guys bassoon.

Hulk Hogan had a sex change and got married (in that order I hope).

A ghost molester was discovered. No one gave a shit.

This girl was announced "hairiest girl in the world". For real.

This guy save the earth from an attack by aliens who resembled eddie macguire (eddie is basically the height of my fears and dislikes so anything bad I imagine to resemble him).

I'm not poking fun at Japan, that shit's intense. But those news readers look like twats.

May my daughters NEVER end up as madonna impersonators. She's so 1980s, they'll be dressed like Gaga for sure.

Happy Friday

Trust

You know what I hate? When you meet someone that you know you can't trust, but you trust them anyway, and then a couple of years later they prove why you shouldn't have given them the time of day in the first place (baitmen). Here's my list of archdouches who shouldn't be trusted... Weather reporters
American mathematicians

This lady. It's ok if you can't use your arms. But who the hell changes that monkey's nappy, and why can't that person just feed you and you could let that monkey go and live in the forest where he belongs? Seriously.

People you meet on the internet. You'll never trust anyone on the internet if you think to yourself, no matter what the profile picture looks like, it's probably this guy.

People who look at porn in public.

People who make fun of retarded kids.

People who exploit retarded kids.

Fuck you friday.

Bad Ass Shit

You ain't cool unless you... Can use txt abbreviations in everyday situations.Can have an injection without crying.

This dude was running away from a snowstorm carrying an ice cream, kinda ironic.

Have a pony. Only then the player haters gonna steal that pony, but it's ok, because you HAD that pony, and that makes you BAD-ASS.

Family portraits...fuck yeah.

This guy/girl is angry. And that's fucking cool you fucking fuck fuck.

As if the sparkly thongs and kids bike wasn't enough, this guy had to slap on some glitter streamers to definitively state "I am a BAD-ASS".

Get some bassoon on your latest jams, it's so hip right now.

Dumb things

Stupid questions, stupid answers, here we go....I'm assuming that's rhetorical. Is there a reason why the killer DIDN'T sodomise him with a bannana?


It's a miracle, praise Saint Dan Murphy

What else are you going to invent with a name like that?

This was the most embarrassing thing for Ben Stiller until he made the movie Dodgeball.

Check out this fat dude, thinks he's holding a bannana, probably never seen one in real life before.

Actually......

Wait......

He's the killer, and he's gonna sodomise you with that PINEAPPLE! Run.

This picture was funnier when I thought that the kid was scared on 50 Cent, turns out he's just a freaky looking kid dancing with 50 Cent, still pretty funny though.

Ed Bundy is a slow ass reader.

11 month old, that's a big sandwich.

No, fuck you actually, it is pretty funny that you take your rabbit for a walk, deal with it.

Makes sense, I suppose.

Worst tattoo, eeevaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

True love can be pretty fucked up.

Random

I came to the stunning realisation that NOTHING is random in the world, sOMe people disagreed with me... So, in honour of the fact that nothing is random, here is a bunch of pictures which have no theme, but certainly aren't random...
Forget finding out who stole my ham from the fridge, let's get a sausage gravy machine in the lunch room!

Kyle, or should I say "nugget", you are a pussy.

Shaq is conducting an orchestra. I repeat. SHAQ is conducting an orchestra. Check out the guy at the back far left, he's all like- WTF?

This isn't random, because nothing is random.

The answer to the age old question, 'who would win in a fight between a buffalo and a bear' is comprehensively answered by the chunks of flesh hanging off that buffalo there.

ewwwww.... cradle cap.

being fat does not preclude me from loving the shit out of fruit.

Being fat does not prevent me from dressing like fruit.

Jesus loves all cats, even the hobo cats that can't blink.

WTF!

Happy friday.